Shapshots of the Heart in a Really Big Week

My son is getting married in 48 hours. *Cue happy tears.*

He’s waited with patience and joyful expectation for this season of his life, and I am nothing but overjoyed for him and his kind, beautiful fiancée. They are ready. These “big” moments in life are so special, deep, and meaningful. I do not take them for granted.

But the way these life events are typically depicted in movies and social media is simply not real life. The idealized, romanticized, fully present emotional bliss, where every moment of the day is meaningful, touching, and laden with symbolism and all the things is just not reality. Those moments will happen, but it won’t be every moment.

Yesterday, my son and I sat in the living room for a cup of coffee, to connect and reflect together—for literally 8 whole minutes. It was all the time we had. We talked briefly about the way you wish your heart could be present every moment in this important season but, let’s face it, you just can’t. We find grace and freedom in accepting that our hearts and minds have a limitation — we are unable to hold an attentive awareness for an entire season, especially one so laden with plans, details, life changes, and big emotions.

But this limitation that doesn’t mean we will miss the moments.

Today, as I look at my to do list with more empty check boxes than I’m sure I can get done in one day (help me, Jesus!), I’m reminding myself to simply take little snapshots in my heart here and there throughout the next few days.

This is not a week in which I can spend an hour alone in quiet reflection like I wish I could. What I can do is pause at random times to just notice the details of the moment I’m in and simply take it in, like clicking the button on a camera, opening a shutter to my heart and allowing the image and accompanying senses to be impressed in such a way that I can recall it later. To stop to notice a special smile or a hug between my son and his fiancée, enjoy the blue sky that we prayed for (no rain, woohoo!), notice a laugh amongst the bridal party, giggle as the girls fuss over their makeup as they get ready together, or the way I know my husband will smile at me so sweetly when I get teary. I will be busy, welcoming and hosting, worrying a little about how to do my often-frizzy hair by myself and whether my shapewear is shaping. But I’m praying for the grace to let these snapshot moments in and leave their imprint on me — moments I will “ponder in my heart” later on.

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There are seasons where we are able spend extended times in solitude and silence with God in reflection, and I am grateful for every one of them. I’m sure you are, too. But in other seasons of this real life we live, that can be difficult to do.

What if we approached the overwhelming seasons of everyday life—good or bad—in the same way we can approach the overwhelm of a beautiful and celebratory event such as a wedding? What if we just paused throughout the day to allow the eyes of our hearts, using all of our senses, to just take a mental and emotional picture of a moment to treasure? That moment of connection with a coworker, a shared smile with a child (who two seconds ago was driving you crazy), the laugh with another parent at your umpteenth youth baseball game.

What if these everyday glimpses are what living from the heart is really about?

Years ago, Paul Baloche wrote the now-familiar song, “Open the eyes of my heart, Lord…I want to see you.” May we live our big moments, like a child’s wedding, and the small ones, like Thursday, inviting Jesus to open the eyes of our heart, take a quick snapshot of the heart, and later be able to see Him right in the middle of it.

May we purpose to notice a moment, however random, in the busy, the to do lists, the stressful, and the beautiful of our lives. May we be reminded that it is the little moments—the seemingly unimpressive, short connections throughout the day—that will last in the heart, not just the “big” ones.

My daughter has been married for nearly three years, so I know from experience that what will be most meaningful about this wedding will be what was most meaningful at hers—the “small” little snapshots my heart took throughout the day. I can’t remember every moment. I can’t remember every detail of the decor and food. I can’t remember what was most stressful or the problems I lay awake about beforehand.

But I remember the way they looked at each other at the altar, the moment where grandparents held their hands out in prayer over the new couple, the laughter of the wedding party, and the way everyone happily hit the dance floor the second the music started. I remember my husband and I holding each other’s hands tightly as our hearts took these kinds of snapshots that we will have and hold forever.

My prayer for me, and my prayer for you today, is for the grace to set aside idealism and any pressure to be constantly present and to embrace the momentary pauses and take snapshots in the heart.

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